When we accept that we live in a quantum world, where everything is connected, we see that all relationships are an invitation into co-creation. Let us unpack this a bit.
If you knew that you were connected to everyone and everything, how would you discern all those relationships? The first step is to dive into a reflection about what that might mean for you. If you were unaware of something before and now can be aware of it in a more conscious way going forward, what might you do differently? This reflective questioning prompts us to consider our intentionality. Since we are connected, what type of connection do I desire in any given relationship? Whether this relationship is: intimate, familial, friendly, professional and /or casual, what is my intention? And since it involves another, it is best to bring them into this dialogue as an intentional collaborator.
If you have been reading these newsletters over time, you know that a common way to check if you are being collaborative is to ask - Am I doing something about someone without them? This question can prompt us out of an unconscious habit of self-construction – where we construct our relationships in the “workshop” of our heads – without others. This is a shift from a habitual monologue – where I am the only one discussing “our” relationship – to a dialogue of collaboration and co-creation.
Now the inherent risk of co-creation in relationships is that I must forfeit my belief that I alone can create relationships. Read that sentence again aloud! It has always been a silly premise. And if I let go of this silly belief, then I allow myself to be vulnerable. This may hav
e been the obstacle all along. If I am vulnerable, I let go of control. And this is absolutely necessary for any co-creation.
I often explain that an invitation means that either a yes or no is an equally valid response. Where yes is the only valid response it is not an invitation, but a demand. So, I invite you to vulnerably consider the invitation of co-creation. You are free to say yes or no. And my experience is that the vulnerability of co-creation is at the heart of all transformation.