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A necessary skill as an executive coach and leader is the ability to change perspectives, like changing lenses, in order to understand something differently. If we change the lens through which we are looking, we see the same things – differently. And if we see what we are looking at differently, it can change us [...]
What Has You Biting?
You are having a conversation and someone says something that presses your button(s). The bait and hook are dangling in front of you. If you react, you may end up talking your way out of the water and straight into their net. It is a choice. Usually it is best for the fisherperson to know [...]
Who Are You?
When I started to do men’s work back in the late 80’s one of the questions we would ask guys was – Who are you? The catch was that you could not answer the question with what you did. This led to a lot of silence and struggle in articulating an answer that was not [...]
Transformational Dialogue: Where Giving and Receiving Come to Play
Presentation for M.A. Psychology Department of Clinical Training and Professional Development at Pepperdine University on November 1, 2011. As clinicians, we predominantly engage folks in conversations. And for the most part, we are the primary technology in the room. Transformational Dialogue is a particular kind of conversation that co-creates an environment where change and transformation [...]
Bringing The Heat
Little vulnerability and passion is a safe and stoic way to live, but it will never create fire.
Why “Buy In” Does Not Work
Buy in does not work because it is compliance dressed up as an invitation.
In the Midst of Chaos
After the 9.0 earthquake and tsunami in Japan, my seventeen year old daughter asked me if there are more disasters lately or does it just seem that way. I confirmed her suspicions and let her know that there have been quite a few as of late, and that I think we are entering a phase [...]